Learning the New Normal

Yesterday I crashed as soon as we put the boys to bed. I am out of shape, but there's no need for joining a gym. I work out now. I had forgotten what it's like having a baby who can't walk yet.

I think we've settled into a routine if I can manage the energy to keep it up. I take them for a walk in the double stroller right after breakfast. One goal in this (besides getting into shape) is to prepare them to go out in public. They have to sit next to each other. The first time we did this I had flashbacks to junior high fights in the hallway. They were not a fan of being that close to one another. I also learned that they don't, at this time, get to hold toys in the stroller. We worked on keeping personal space. Today was much much better. They looked very civilized. We're getting there.

Then we played outside until about 11:00. The weather has been so nice it's almost like fall...in July! I plan to take Daniel outside so much that by the end of the summer he doesn't know life without being outside. He likes it so much better than this time last week! He likes the swing, baby pool, and playing on a blanket in the shade. He doesn't venture off of the blanket which is fine with me for now. Joshua is not allowed on his blanket as he has the run of our entire yard. Joshua has gotten so much better at giving Daniel space. So much better. We have to tell Daniel the same thing, though we still have to pick him up and redirect him.

Daniel is eating well and we can definitely tell he's gaining weight. We have contacted Scottish Rite (thanks to some good friends suggesting we go ahead and not wait for a ped. referral). They are supposed to call us in the next couple of days to set up an appointment. Nathan said they were above and beyond good service over the phone. He has his physical next Monday and his evaluation with Babies Can't Wait July 29th. These three things will help us get to know our little man and know how to care for him.

I praise God that this child who a week ago was eating formula and rice cereal today ate (pureed or in a bottle):

-3 bottles of whole milk, formula, and rice cereal
-1/2 avocodo
-1 banana
-1 egg
-1 serving of applesauce
-1 pouch of pumpkin, squash, sweet potato
-handfull of blueberries
-handful of strawberries
-1/2 container of vanilla pudding
-multivitamin

That makes a Mama feel so good.

Today was so much smoother than yesterday. Joshua napped and I got to have my quiet time with no interruptions. That always helps. Yesterday the morning went well (besides meltdowns and the initial stroller fight), but by the afternoon I was exhausted. I turned on the TV and called my mother..and cried for an hour. Really.

When Nathan and I were discussing our day last night, I told him that there were times when I had done everything I knew to do and Daniel wasn't happy that I just looked at him and said "Sometimes you just have to choose to be happy Buddy" and we'd go on with our day. Daniel would calm down and smile again eventually. Nathan later said, "Katherine, you're so afraid you're going to do this all wrong and hurt somebody. You just have to choose to be confident." That was probably the biggest difference between today and yesterday. I chose confidence. I made a decision and those little guys had to put up with it. I was a lot more firm today, and they seemed more content (much to nobody's surprise I'm sure) ;) . I guess by faith I'll have to make the same decision tomorrow.

I look at pictures of siblings sitting together in pictures and I long to see these two sit together for a picture smiling. Then I remember that they have been brothers for three weeks. They are two years old. When I see these pictures of others, they've known each other much longer. I'm just going to have to give it time. But I want to document this longing because I pray that years from now I look back on this post with amazement in what God has done in their hearts.

Some breakthroughs in brotherly bonding:
-Joshua described his family yesterday including Daniel for the first time. He said "Dat oo-eee (mommy). Dat daddy. Dat baby an-el. Dat Josh-u budder."
-We put them to bed tonight and left the room without either of them asleep yet. (video moniters with an intercom make this possible) I guess my thinking is that sharing a room and riding in a stroller together will help. Hey, some may say getting into good hardy fights will help too. I guess I can list that one too. ;)

We spent our evening outside in the almost cool air and sunshine, Joshua picking blueberries in his diaper, Daniel laying on his blanket playing with toys, and Chloe (our dog) watching close by. Nathan came home with supper prepared by a friend. We ate on paper plates. The boys are now asleep. And all is right with the world. ;)